Change is Good – As in HAIR

No one likes change. I actually despise change. One of the characteristics of a Taurus  (April 20 – May 20) is our fear of the unknown. And change is unknown.

But change is a part of life. With each day comes new growth and change. Some is good – and some is not so good.

In times when changes in my life have made me distraught or anxious I do what many women do.

I change my hair.

In 2007 after my beach wedding I chopped my hair off. I let it grow and grow for the wedding (as much as my fine thin hair would grow anyways) and then bam. Off with your head. I couldn’t take it anymore. I remember sitting in the chair in the salon and saying CUT IT OFF! I lightened it as well!

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In 2010 after the birth of the Chiquita – as my post partum depression was settling in and fogging up my brain – I went to the store and bought the darkest brown hair color I could find. (I was once told to never dye your hair black!) I remember having this medium-length dark blonde hair but inside I felt so icky. It didn’t fit. I wanted dark hair because I felt dark inside.

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And then a little over a year after my depression expression I went to salon and said: Lighten Me Up! I remember my hair stylist saying: I don’t know if we should go that light. Your hair might fall out.

Almost in tears I said: I can’t look at this hair anymore. It reminds me of bad times, and I’m happy now. I need to get rid of this hair so I can see a lighter and happier me.

And it's pretty much looked this way since...
And it’s pretty much looked this way since…
July 4, 2013
July 4, 2013

And now, here we are again, another change looming and I headed to the salon. This time I went for a chop (we took 5.5 inches off!!!) and a color change from the dark blonde I’m so familiar with to a dark brown.

This was from my Pajama Photo Shoot after a couple glasses of wine. I've decided to  delete the other photos.
This was from my Pajama Photo Shoot after a couple of glasses of wine. I’ve decided to delete the other photos. Trust me, it was a good decision. :) In one of the pictures I was a cat. For realz.
Side view!
Side view!

As I write this I’m looking in the mirror on my desk. I think I like it and then I don’t like it and then I look at these pictures and go do I like it? It’s a bit shocking to me.

I need to express my changes in a big away. My whole life, my whole existence!, is changing…I can’t possibly go about it looking the same.

I needed to see a new me. I needed to see that I’ll be OK, and I can keep on keeping on. And when things turn around again maybe I’ll try a platinum blonde look??? ;)

What do you do during times of change?