The problem with any story really is that there’s your side, my side and the truth. People forget this. They think their story is the story. They think they didn’t do anything wrong. They justify actions and behaviors. They embellish. They twist and turn until the story is to their liking. Until they feel okay with the story.
But the truth is, the story no longer resembles what actually happened, but what you in fact think happened. Those people I feel sorry for. The ones who don’t have enough depth to understand that some people just spew darkness and anger because they don’t have the brain capacity to think that maybe there is another side to the story. And then maybe there is the actual truth.
Better yet is when the tall tales come from friends or “loved” ones. They didn’t actually live in the story. They lived in a part of the story. So then they further embellish the story.
It’s like that old game of Telephone where you whisper in someone’s ear ‘the girl is 5’ and the end of the telephone chain is ‘the boy is 15 with freckles and bad hair.’ It doesn’t make sense to me.
I am by no means perfect. Read back in this blog and you’ll know. I’ve made many mistakes. But, in the end I decided to write my story the way it needed to be written. I decided to stop allowing others to write my story for me, the way they saw it.
People who don’t take the time to look at themselves yet project negative emotions on other people are weak. I took the time to look at myself. I took the time to say, wow, I’m a fucked up person. And I’ve worked hard to change to become the person I want to be.
I’m brave because I’ve shared things with you. Deep, hard things to write about. Sad and embarrassing things I wish I could take back. But the truth of the matter is it’s all shaped me to be the woman and mother I am today. I’m brave because I chose to change.
I beg you. The next time you want to say one bad thing about another person please take a moment to think of five good things about yourself. Because if you’re feeling good about yourself you won’t have time to feel badly about others.